Friday, September 23, 2005
science needs to solve the equation
of the everyday tasks that seem to be built up an invisible incline.
Thursday, September 22, 2005
precis of "phenomenology of error"
it takes a lot more than just doing something wrong
to get noticed.
to get noticed.
the phenomenology of error
Why I like my English bent, if not broken:
1. They hanged out with me (easy to say).
2. I had got run over (conveys choppy-ness of action).
3. Sharon and me are going home now (sounds relaxing).
3. You see, what had happened was (signals lie)....
1. They hanged out with me (easy to say).
2. I had got run over (conveys choppy-ness of action).
3. Sharon and me are going home now (sounds relaxing).
3. You see, what had happened was (signals lie)....
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
seems like
languishing is a characteristic of time: time languishes, and I steady myself against the lockers.
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
when second street laundry goes under
you feel sad for 1 second
Then you think, woo hoo, free parking in the Corridor.
Then you think, woo hoo, free parking in the Corridor.
stats
current height: 5 6
current weight: 117.5 (but no eczema)
fashion idol: jennifer lopez
current workout goal: lifting heavy things with ass, to make more fabulous.
current weight: 117.5 (but no eczema)
fashion idol: jennifer lopez
current workout goal: lifting heavy things with ass, to make more fabulous.
woo hoo
celebrity body twin: Jennifer Lopez (based on quiz by ivillage.com on height, weight and body measurements).
when autistic people get in the news
we typically are doing something stupid like wandering around in our pyjamas, shutting the world out.
Waait a second, that's what I'm doing today.
Waait a second, that's what I'm doing today.
good press
“Many of these people are pretty successful, as artists, mathematicians, scholars,” said Walter Zahorodny, assistant professor of pediatrics at New Jersey Medical School, Newark, and director of New Jersey's “Answers for Autism” survey. “Many do achieve a career and can be successful in their occupation. They're successful in most of the ways we gauge success, with jobs and families.”
http://www.aspennj.org/ArticleDifferentForDecades.html
http://www.aspennj.org/ArticleDifferentForDecades.html
blind spot
"You know, I don't think of you eating except when you are at my house", said name deleted.
"So when you said you were too full for a doughnut because you had had malted milk balls, I thought, but the only candy Hilary has had today is the candy that I have given her".
"So when you said you were too full for a doughnut because you had had malted milk balls, I thought, but the only candy Hilary has had today is the candy that I have given her".
fantasy travel schedule for Malcolm X
1. Wal Mart.
2. the Writing Center.
3. downriver.
4. the resource room (for students with learning disabilities)
5. the community access terminals in all underfunded public libraries
6. Apartment Finders
2. the Writing Center.
3. downriver.
4. the resource room (for students with learning disabilities)
5. the community access terminals in all underfunded public libraries
6. Apartment Finders
globalization
Jedda, Saudi Arabia
Cairo, Egypt
Frankfurt, Germany
Accra, Ghana
Indonesia
China
Algiers, Algeria
Cuba
Uganda
Guinea
Mecca, Saudi Arabia
Beirut, Lebanon
Nigeria
London, England
Japan
Afghanistan
Mali
Tanzania
Kenya
Cairo, Egypt
Frankfurt, Germany
Accra, Ghana
Indonesia
China
Algiers, Algeria
Cuba
Uganda
Guinea
Mecca, Saudi Arabia
Beirut, Lebanon
Nigeria
London, England
Japan
Afghanistan
Mali
Tanzania
Kenya
Saturday, September 17, 2005
tech comm. for idiots
Saturday morning, my car broke down on Cass and Seldon. I called my stepfather.
"Steve, my car is broken down" I said, "and I think the problem probably is caused by a disconnect between the alternator and the battery cable".
"Hmm, that could be" said Steve. "Have any idiot lights come on?"
I thought. "Come to think of it, the battery light came on a few days ago".
"Aha," said Steve. "It sounds like the problem is a disconnect between the idiot and the idiot light".
"Steve, my car is broken down" I said, "and I think the problem probably is caused by a disconnect between the alternator and the battery cable".
"Hmm, that could be" said Steve. "Have any idiot lights come on?"
I thought. "Come to think of it, the battery light came on a few days ago".
"Aha," said Steve. "It sounds like the problem is a disconnect between the idiot and the idiot light".
Introducing: Kurt "Name deleted" Spellmyer
1. At what age did you realize that you were destined to become a great leader of your people?
"After many fruitless hours stuck at this impasse" (105).
2. Who are your people, anyway?
"Eleventh graders in the state where I live" (105).
3. In what specific ways will things change once you are in charge?
"Initially, wery little" (106).
4. List the specific steps you plan to take to keep from getting assassinated for something you wrote in college:
with "the shelving of the Qualls report" (107).
through "supporting the iron scaffolding of departments and disciplines" (106).
by "pretending to be" an innocuous course description.
"After many fruitless hours stuck at this impasse" (105).
2. Who are your people, anyway?
"Eleventh graders in the state where I live" (105).
3. In what specific ways will things change once you are in charge?
"Initially, wery little" (106).
4. List the specific steps you plan to take to keep from getting assassinated for something you wrote in college:
with "the shelving of the Qualls report" (107).
through "supporting the iron scaffolding of departments and disciplines" (106).
by "pretending to be" an innocuous course description.
your story/your project
The Malcolm X-related "your story/ your project" questions from the first day of English 1020:
1. At what age did you first realize that you were destined to become a great leader of your people?
2. Ok, who are your people anyway?
3. In what specific ways are things going to change when you are in charge (notice: I did not swear in class).
4. List the specific steps that you plan to take to keep from getting assassinated for something you wrote in college.
1. At what age did you first realize that you were destined to become a great leader of your people?
2. Ok, who are your people anyway?
3. In what specific ways are things going to change when you are in charge (notice: I did not swear in class).
4. List the specific steps that you plan to take to keep from getting assassinated for something you wrote in college.
People
Name deleted has conceptualized all traditionally academic behaviors as attention-seeking, bragging and pretentious--and may have a point. Name Deleted is smug that I have to change my syllabus. Refrigerator or not, Name Deleted is collecting the rent.
My project
is to start a ghetto for autistic people, I said on the phone with Name Deleted. We would have independence and self respect but there is a lot of pressure to support AI-owned businesses.
When nonautistic people get an idea in their minds
there is no getting it out, I thought, looking at the ominous stain on my floorboards.
reading this blog (a note about interpretation)
This blog is an abandoned class project that I later took up again in a very different way as part of a "literary" project with 4 of my close girlfriends.
Those girlfriends were my only intended and known audience till recently, when I became aware that there is a wider readership for this blog.
No matter who is reading, though, I prefer to keep the blog exactly as it is while addressing a few concerns about anonymity and interpretation.
1) Anonymity.
I'm an open kind of human being--there is nothing I've written here that I would hesitate to say (or haven't said) in my own office.
However, my friends and colleagues are also represented on this blog and they do deserve to have some control over how they are represented to the newer wider audience.
Therfore, I am going to change the names of all actual people to Name Deleted. That should be an interesting literary move since there will now be only 2 characters in the blog: me and Name Deleted.
As I forget who actually said what, peoples' identities will get blurred together and I get to look at the broader human themes in peoples' relationships. Cool.
2. Interpretation.
As part of a literary project, the genre of this blog is an electronic memoir.
A memoir is a form of literary autobiography: in a memoir, you take things that happened to you as the inital source for writing, but you add elements of fictional writing such as merging or synthesizing actual events and characters, dramatic tension and fantasy: you represent the spirit and resonance of what happened, not the bare facts. There is a substantial tradition of memoir blogging on the web.
With my closer friends, I have a lot of chances to talk directly about what actually happened vs. what is "literary" fantasy. In fact, posts are often inspired by conversations with them:
"Awww, I WISH I/he/they had said/done that! It would be soooo funny. I'll write it that way on my blog".
But for a wider audience, I don't always have that chance. If you recognize yourself as Name Deleted and you are thinking, "wait a minute, it didn't go exactly like that", that's perfectly normal in literary autobiography.
But, if you are OFFENDED by the representation of you on this blog, be sure to let me know and we'll talk through some possible changes--especially if you think you could be identifiable to a wider audience.
Those girlfriends were my only intended and known audience till recently, when I became aware that there is a wider readership for this blog.
No matter who is reading, though, I prefer to keep the blog exactly as it is while addressing a few concerns about anonymity and interpretation.
1) Anonymity.
I'm an open kind of human being--there is nothing I've written here that I would hesitate to say (or haven't said) in my own office.
However, my friends and colleagues are also represented on this blog and they do deserve to have some control over how they are represented to the newer wider audience.
Therfore, I am going to change the names of all actual people to Name Deleted. That should be an interesting literary move since there will now be only 2 characters in the blog: me and Name Deleted.
As I forget who actually said what, peoples' identities will get blurred together and I get to look at the broader human themes in peoples' relationships. Cool.
2. Interpretation.
As part of a literary project, the genre of this blog is an electronic memoir.
A memoir is a form of literary autobiography: in a memoir, you take things that happened to you as the inital source for writing, but you add elements of fictional writing such as merging or synthesizing actual events and characters, dramatic tension and fantasy: you represent the spirit and resonance of what happened, not the bare facts. There is a substantial tradition of memoir blogging on the web.
With my closer friends, I have a lot of chances to talk directly about what actually happened vs. what is "literary" fantasy. In fact, posts are often inspired by conversations with them:
"Awww, I WISH I/he/they had said/done that! It would be soooo funny. I'll write it that way on my blog".
But for a wider audience, I don't always have that chance. If you recognize yourself as Name Deleted and you are thinking, "wait a minute, it didn't go exactly like that", that's perfectly normal in literary autobiography.
But, if you are OFFENDED by the representation of you on this blog, be sure to let me know and we'll talk through some possible changes--especially if you think you could be identifiable to a wider audience.
Thursday, September 15, 2005
she looked so
blank, like the white part of a rubber band that had been stretched beyond its elasticity.
a lot has changed
she said at the end. But I can't tell you exactly how.
The frown is new, I said helpfully.
The frown is new, I said helpfully.
stop doing anything
I didn't want our first conversation to be awkward, she says.
Do you feel awkward now?
Yes.
Is there anything I can do to help you feel less awkward?
The answer comes to me in my mind: stop doing anything. And go away soon.
Do you feel awkward now?
Yes.
Is there anything I can do to help you feel less awkward?
The answer comes to me in my mind: stop doing anything. And go away soon.
a smile-free zone.
She is sitting across from me with her arms folded up. She looks like an angry stuffed animal.
just a sec, I got to get some coffee
I reach for the Ethiophian yirgacheffe and the counter girl whisks it away. My cup gets filled with organic body and soul. I take my hand off the carafe and it gets immediately replaced by a fresh caraffe of yirgacheffe.
She puts the fuzzy color deleted house coat back on.
She puts the fuzzy color deleted house coat back on.
in the car
I made a sign of the cross and ate the last square of a hershey bar wrapped in foil. What is it with me and Jesus these days?
dressing down
When people go to have important conversations, Wally observed this morning on our stairs, the instinct is to dress up. But that instinct is wrong. I think what you need to do is be absolutely sure to dress lower than the person you're going to talk to. Dress down.
I froze. There wasn't much time.
How low is down, Wally? Said Wally satirically. Earth to Hilary.
Wally, how low is down? I repeated.
Sweats and a hijab, said Wally: or, if you are not Muslim, a hoody.
I froze. There wasn't much time.
How low is down, Wally? Said Wally satirically. Earth to Hilary.
Wally, how low is down? I repeated.
Sweats and a hijab, said Wally: or, if you are not Muslim, a hoody.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
foreclosure
"Is defined as not having to pay rent for 7 months and then being payed to leave", Waleska translated. "Especially in this city, where people's definition of "vacating" the premises means to stop paying the electric bill".
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
people.
People keep coming up to me and looking at me accusatively and saying, what happened to her hair? It shrank! How could you let that happen?
And what I keep telling them is, I wash my hands of this legendary haircut. I haven't even SEEN it. And the parking meters glower in hell.
And what I keep telling them is, I wash my hands of this legendary haircut. I haven't even SEEN it. And the parking meters glower in hell.
words words words
Date: Tue, 13 Sep 2005 21:52:02 -0400
From: HILARY WARD Add To Address Book | This is Spam
Subject: Re: city life
To: 6010@LISTS.WAYNE.EDU
Ancient. It goes with the agoraphobic theme of city life :
Bob! Let's get some words between us and this here problem.
Aw crap, wait a second...it looks like the problem is MADE
out of words.
Hilary
---- Original message ----
>Date: Tue, 13 Sep 2005 21:46:31 -0400
>From: "J.Rice"
>Subject: Re: city life
>To: ag9521@wayne.edu
>
>and the second book you want to review is...? Ancient rhetoric or Everything is an argument?
>
From: HILARY WARD
Subject: Re: city life
To: 6010@LISTS.WAYNE.EDU
Ancient. It goes with the agoraphobic theme of city life :
Bob! Let's get some words between us and this here problem.
Aw crap, wait a second...it looks like the problem is MADE
out of words.
Hilary
---- Original message ----
>Date: Tue, 13 Sep 2005 21:46:31 -0400
>From: "J.Rice"
>Subject: Re: city life
>To: ag9521@wayne.edu
>
>and the second book you want to review is...? Ancient rhetoric or Everything is an argument?
>
sharon live
From Sharon's up to the minute parody of Hilary:
What do you THINK about in your mind? Like, I'm Hilary. If I had a collection of things, what would I name it? How would the name change if I found the things on the ground? If they fell from the sky? If they made an obnoxious "whir" and spun in the air? What would I name that category of things? Now I don't know the answer to that question right now, but I know I want to name my del.icio.us tags after it.
What do you THINK about in your mind? Like, I'm Hilary. If I had a collection of things, what would I name it? How would the name change if I found the things on the ground? If they fell from the sky? If they made an obnoxious "whir" and spun in the air? What would I name that category of things? Now I don't know the answer to that question right now, but I know I want to name my del.icio.us tags after it.
mmm bookmark
Sharon tries to name her del.icio.us tag collection:
www.del.icio.us/bite my lyrics
ASSholes! She yelled. Ok. Fucking
www.del.icio.us/byte_my_lyrics
(yeah)
Irony-stealing hip hop ASSholes! Fucking
www.del.icio.us/byte_mylyrics
And then there was silence.
www.del.icio.us/bite my lyrics
ASSholes! She yelled. Ok. Fucking
www.del.icio.us/byte_my_lyrics
(yeah)
Irony-stealing hip hop ASSholes! Fucking
www.del.icio.us/byte_mylyrics
And then there was silence.
when you teach you have to do the open standing posture
said Sharon.
I stood on the pavement with my arms outstretched.
Waaay to open, Hilary. Said Sharon. Waaay too open.
I stood on the pavement with my arms outstretched.
Waaay to open, Hilary. Said Sharon. Waaay too open.
current stats
current height: 3 foot 7 (in supple Writing Center chair)
current weight: 117 (but eczema free)
current mood: making a chart
current weight: 117 (but eczema free)
current mood: making a chart
the boss of the boss of the boss of Name Deleted
created this:
"It was with these concerns in mind that the Executive Committee of the Conference on College Composition and Communication, in 1972, passed the following resolution:
We affirm the students' right to their own patterns and varieties of language -- the dialects of their nurture or whatever dialects in which they find their own identity and style. Language scholars long ago denied that the myth of a standard American dialect has any validity. The claim that any one dialect is unacceptable amounts to an attempt of one social group to exert its dominance over another. Such a claim leads to false advice for speakers and writers, and immoral advice for humans. A nation proud of its diverse heritage and its cultural and racial variety will preserve its heritage of dialects. We affirm strongly that teachers must have the experiences and training that will enable them to respect diversity and uphold the right of students to their own language.
The members of the Committee realized that the resolution would create controversy and that without a clear explanation of the linguistic and social knowledge on which it rests, many people would find it incomprehensible". (CCCC, "Students' right to their own language", 1972).
"It was with these concerns in mind that the Executive Committee of the Conference on College Composition and Communication, in 1972, passed the following resolution:
We affirm the students' right to their own patterns and varieties of language -- the dialects of their nurture or whatever dialects in which they find their own identity and style. Language scholars long ago denied that the myth of a standard American dialect has any validity. The claim that any one dialect is unacceptable amounts to an attempt of one social group to exert its dominance over another. Such a claim leads to false advice for speakers and writers, and immoral advice for humans. A nation proud of its diverse heritage and its cultural and racial variety will preserve its heritage of dialects. We affirm strongly that teachers must have the experiences and training that will enable them to respect diversity and uphold the right of students to their own language.
The members of the Committee realized that the resolution would create controversy and that without a clear explanation of the linguistic and social knowledge on which it rests, many people would find it incomprehensible". (CCCC, "Students' right to their own language", 1972).
the reason being is
I just made up a personality quiz in my mind called "Which Composition Faculty Member Are You?".
Question 5 is: Are you secretly an Ellen fan?
If you answer "no" to Question 5, then: You Are Ellen.
The reason being is, if Ellen were Ellen's student then Ellen would NOT be an Ellen fan.
Question 5 is: Are you secretly an Ellen fan?
If you answer "no" to Question 5, then: You Are Ellen.
The reason being is, if Ellen were Ellen's student then Ellen would NOT be an Ellen fan.
commentary
I want to write a follow-up statement to CCCC "Students' Right To Their Own Language" titled "Students' right to their own position on language rights".
Monday, September 12, 2005
Sunday, September 11, 2005
When someone DAMAges your PROperdy
my dad stammered when he saw the drunk asshole scrape on my car,
"you NEED to take that as an injury to yourself or to your person".
It never ceases to amaze me that this is a philsophy invented primarily by Christians.
"you NEED to take that as an injury to yourself or to your person".
It never ceases to amaze me that this is a philsophy invented primarily by Christians.
an insightful reflection
Why do rich people always hide their plunger in cunning and secret places?
Note:A plunger is a technology that is supposed to have a minimal word/use ratio. Not being able to find it just generates conversation, ie, problems.
Note:A plunger is a technology that is supposed to have a minimal word/use ratio. Not being able to find it just generates conversation, ie, problems.
beep beep beep
oh look (at the aruvedic calendar, which of course you have downloaded into your cell phone like me), it's time for ritual fasting again. Note: fasting is benefical for diseases of the skin.
Days of ritual fasting: 4 min.
Patches of eczema: 6.
Days of ritual fasting: 4 min.
Patches of eczema: 6.
still the nightmares
where she is being hurt or dying and I know I am capable to come and help, but am not allowed.
What's even more disturbing is, I think I got the basic theme of that off of South Park.
What's even more disturbing is, I think I got the basic theme of that off of South Park.
location: Hillsdale Michigan
Patches of eczema: 6
Weight gained from anti-eczema steroids: 3.5 lbs (but for good cause).
Current mood: Hopeful (am leaving Hillsdale in 24 minutes).
Weight gained from anti-eczema steroids: 3.5 lbs (but for good cause).
Current mood: Hopeful (am leaving Hillsdale in 24 minutes).
Saturday, September 10, 2005
diagon alley
The image of the County Fair auction was too much to pick up and carry around inside me.
I scurried across the edges of "downtown" Hillsdale, clutching my kitcat bar defensively.
A storm was coming. A lot of horsey people with puffy faces and slopey brows who speak a strange and incomprehensible dialect of English started to go away. The gray clouds bared their fangs.
The lower East side of town swayed in the wind. Birds fluttered in dry leaves.
Leaning against a wedge of abandoned storefronts, I listened to the soothing flap flap flap of a screen door.
The sign on the door said
"HILLSDALE GREEN PARTY".
Curiouser and curiouser. I yanked on the door. There was a blinding noise. So I closed my eyes and covered my ears. The noise went and went and went.
Then I recognized the noise and opened my eyes in pure astonishment.
There was a cheerful wooden sign that read "the annex". The smell of coffee and WiFi satured the athmosphere. Sofas and end tables were wreathed in holiday lights.
I saw a board on the back wall painted with 1 giant pastel dot.
"I see", I said politely.
"Welcolme to the annex", said a man with a head of blonde ringlets, "Hillsdale's only organic coffeehouse, bookstore and yoga center".
The mutal silence was filled with track 4 from Vince Guiraldi's Grace Cathedral concert.
"The Green Party sign is part of a screening process", he said crisply. "This is still a....covert operation"..
The industrial strenght coffee grinder whirred. This is a story about how people carry an erector set model of their neighborhood around with them, and set it up wherever they can.
I scurried across the edges of "downtown" Hillsdale, clutching my kitcat bar defensively.
A storm was coming. A lot of horsey people with puffy faces and slopey brows who speak a strange and incomprehensible dialect of English started to go away. The gray clouds bared their fangs.
The lower East side of town swayed in the wind. Birds fluttered in dry leaves.
Leaning against a wedge of abandoned storefronts, I listened to the soothing flap flap flap of a screen door.
The sign on the door said
"HILLSDALE GREEN PARTY".
Curiouser and curiouser. I yanked on the door. There was a blinding noise. So I closed my eyes and covered my ears. The noise went and went and went.
Then I recognized the noise and opened my eyes in pure astonishment.
There was a cheerful wooden sign that read "the annex". The smell of coffee and WiFi satured the athmosphere. Sofas and end tables were wreathed in holiday lights.
I saw a board on the back wall painted with 1 giant pastel dot.
"I see", I said politely.
"Welcolme to the annex", said a man with a head of blonde ringlets, "Hillsdale's only organic coffeehouse, bookstore and yoga center".
The mutal silence was filled with track 4 from Vince Guiraldi's Grace Cathedral concert.
"The Green Party sign is part of a screening process", he said crisply. "This is still a....covert operation"..
The industrial strenght coffee grinder whirred. This is a story about how people carry an erector set model of their neighborhood around with them, and set it up wherever they can.
land is like water,
though.
For example:
I want to start a project to build New Orleans a couple of miles North--along
Jefferson ave.
Chris claims that if he can't find any gettoes in Japan he is going to start one.
Nish's project for Assignment 4 is to make Hillsdale into the Far South Side of Detroit.
For example:
I want to start a project to build New Orleans a couple of miles North--along
Jefferson ave.
Chris claims that if he can't find any gettoes in Japan he is going to start one.
Nish's project for Assignment 4 is to make Hillsdale into the Far South Side of Detroit.
what I'm listening to
From Lauryn Hill's stunning translation of the book of Joshua:
god. decanting out my soul to me from hour to hour, drawing out
my nature with his hands:
yearning, I am thirsty for his power/
burning to be worthy of this land: which is like
water, water.
god. decanting out my soul to me from hour to hour, drawing out
my nature with his hands:
yearning, I am thirsty for his power/
burning to be worthy of this land: which is like
water, water.
Friday, September 09, 2005
bright yellow hat
"Now list", I started.
The classroom door opened and boy wearing a bright yellow mediterranean hat sauntered in. I waited for him to sit down.
"list the specific steps you plan to take to keep from getting assassinated for something you wrote in college", I finished.
The brim of the hat turned up, which revealed familiar sparkling yes.
"Johna--" I almost shouted out, then bit my lip professionally. "Now list..."
The classroom door opened and boy wearing a bright yellow mediterranean hat sauntered in. I waited for him to sit down.
"list the specific steps you plan to take to keep from getting assassinated for something you wrote in college", I finished.
The brim of the hat turned up, which revealed familiar sparkling yes.
"Johna--" I almost shouted out, then bit my lip professionally. "Now list..."
Thursday, September 08, 2005
the towels are in the dryer
when can feel yourself dying inside you think: I wish I wish I could just wake up one day and have it be gone. That woudl be amazing.
But when that finally happens, it is not amazing. It is not anything.
You were a lost sheep that wandered away from life. But life isn't mad about that. It has seen this kind of thing before. It came searching for you.
Then you reached back and snap, nothing. You are just normal boring alive and the towels are in the dryer.
But when that finally happens, it is not amazing. It is not anything.
You were a lost sheep that wandered away from life. But life isn't mad about that. It has seen this kind of thing before. It came searching for you.
Then you reached back and snap, nothing. You are just normal boring alive and the towels are in the dryer.
current location
Right now, I am the only human being in the Writing Center.
If she knew, this fact would make Sharon extremely nervous.
If she knew, this fact would make Sharon extremely nervous.
permanent moose
This morning I took off the humiliating shower cap to rinse the color developing creme off my hair, and was spontaneously teleported to Walgreens.
HEelp, I said sleepily, do you have anything to rinse the burgundy out of my hair?
And the girls at Walgreens burst into laughter, and sent me off with a 99 cent burgundy colored eyebrow pencil.
HEelp, I said sleepily, do you have anything to rinse the burgundy out of my hair?
And the girls at Walgreens burst into laughter, and sent me off with a 99 cent burgundy colored eyebrow pencil.
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
Sharon gave me a blank look
and shook her head and clanged around for some ale glasses.
Your kitchen is a satellite of State Hall, I chirped.
Listen to me, Sharon said steadily. There comes a point with people, when their language breakes down.
Wha--
You know, with certain people.
And when that happens, they reach this horizon of irrationality where
Where?
Where they are not talking to you anymore. Their language is directed to you, but they are talking to something inside themselves, not you. You are not even a character in the story.
What?
Remember that, said Sharon. I'm glad we're teaching the Malcolm X books together. I see all the paperbacks on the shelves at Marwil's and it feels
so
satisfying.
Your kitchen is a satellite of State Hall, I chirped.
Listen to me, Sharon said steadily. There comes a point with people, when their language breakes down.
Wha--
You know, with certain people.
And when that happens, they reach this horizon of irrationality where
Where?
Where they are not talking to you anymore. Their language is directed to you, but they are talking to something inside themselves, not you. You are not even a character in the story.
What?
Remember that, said Sharon. I'm glad we're teaching the Malcolm X books together. I see all the paperbacks on the shelves at Marwil's and it feels
so
satisfying.
last night
(I dreamed about this: the taste of hot coffee, honey, sugar and cardboard.
And then I woke up and it was a dream, and I was starving and impatient and looking for something to wear to school.
And then I woke up and it was a dream, and I was starving and impatient and looking for something to wear to school.
and in walks Cheryl
fifteen minutes later, looking flushed.
So, she said softly, will this book be as...stimulating as Fanny Hill? That was the last book of yours I dared to read.
I blushed.
And just so you know, she whispered. I finally ordered my own copy on Amazon.com.
So, she said softly, will this book be as...stimulating as Fanny Hill? That was the last book of yours I dared to read.
I blushed.
And just so you know, she whispered. I finally ordered my own copy on Amazon.com.
the lee translation
While listening to me, Sharon and Lawanda, Cheryl got on the library computer:
The Autobiography of Malcolm X With The Assistance of Alex Haley? Is that the book you all are talking about?
Um, said Sharon.
I think, I said.
I think that that version was translated into Chinese and then translated back, said Sharon helpfully.
.
The Autobiography of Malcolm X With The Assistance of Alex Haley? Is that the book you all are talking about?
Um, said Sharon.
I think, I said.
I think that that version was translated into Chinese and then translated back, said Sharon helpfully.
.
"Ooooooh no,
she thinks she is going to tell *me*"....etcetera etcetera etcetera....is precisely the kind of reaction that is to be avoided at all costs here.
mmm, on second thought, however
you kind of have to admire someone who actually comes out and SAYs, look, I like and appreciate you. Andso, what I want is to have a friendly relationship with you where I am completely in charge of every interaction until forever o'clock or further notice.
ok, on one hand
you can be friends with someone and then not be friends with them. But what you are not supposed to do is be friends with someone and then revert to a heirarchical relationship.
So Sharon was checking my departmental mail
and she was like, there are two things that looked important so I took the liberty of--of opening them because I knew you wouldn't.
Cool!
1 of them is from Dr. Naughton welcolming you to the graduate course in I/O engineering.
Yay! I said happily.
Dress conservatively. said Sharon.
And the second one, well, it's a very boring letter from Name deleted.
What's it about?
Oh... nothing. It is really boring. I should just trash it for you.
But what boring things does it SAY?
Look, Sharon intimated, I know that you are REALLY offended by inconsistent behavior. So the best thing for your relationship with Name deleted is not to read this one, because if you did, the best thing for you to do would be to not react to it, which you won't. But I know you are probably going to start asking for more details. So I have to hang up the phone now.
I dialed Neal.
mmmHello? said Neal.
Hi! I said politely, what it is?
HI-I-I-Laryy, said Neal, is this one of those late night Name deleted-related phone calls?
Um, no, I said.
The reason being is I've noticed that I've been getting those calls less and less, and gosh darn it, I'm going to miss them when they stop completely.
Cool!
1 of them is from Dr. Naughton welcolming you to the graduate course in I/O engineering.
Yay! I said happily.
Dress conservatively. said Sharon.
And the second one, well, it's a very boring letter from Name deleted.
What's it about?
Oh... nothing. It is really boring. I should just trash it for you.
But what boring things does it SAY?
Look, Sharon intimated, I know that you are REALLY offended by inconsistent behavior. So the best thing for your relationship with Name deleted is not to read this one, because if you did, the best thing for you to do would be to not react to it, which you won't. But I know you are probably going to start asking for more details. So I have to hang up the phone now.
I dialed Neal.
mmmHello? said Neal.
Hi! I said politely, what it is?
HI-I-I-Laryy, said Neal, is this one of those late night Name deleted-related phone calls?
Um, no, I said.
The reason being is I've noticed that I've been getting those calls less and less, and gosh darn it, I'm going to miss them when they stop completely.
Sunday, September 04, 2005
Reading Assignments
Reading Assignments
There are no reading assignments in English 1020 (see below).
The departmentally reader and writing handbook (The World is a Text/ The Scott Forsman Writer) provide an invaluable resource for you as you create your own handbook and anthology (see below). Every day in class, we articulate connections between a chapter of The Autobiography of Malcolm X and students’ individual projects; prepare to be internally oppressed by your own boredom if you chose not to read.
There are no reading assignments in English 1020 (see below).
The departmentally reader and writing handbook (The World is a Text/ The Scott Forsman Writer) provide an invaluable resource for you as you create your own handbook and anthology (see below). Every day in class, we articulate connections between a chapter of The Autobiography of Malcolm X and students’ individual projects; prepare to be internally oppressed by your own boredom if you chose not to read.
Sarah and me (#4)
What if it had been her? I think about that. It could have happened. Same tall,same young, same pretty, same social problems.
I think that Sarah would have speed dialed campus security.
I think that Sarah would have speed dialed campus security.
Sarah and me (#3)
I tried to teach Sarah the short bus rap, a rhyme I made up about students with disabilities who stick together.
Shhh, she said. People might hear you.
Shhh, she said. People might hear you.
Sarah and me (#2)
On March 10 in the Department Sarah came over to me and sat down and said "See? Now you are among friends!".
She was petting the back of my desk chair.
Saaaaaraaaaaah? I said shyly. What are you doing?
You see, Sarah explained. I know that you do no like to be touched so I am hugging your chair instead.
She was petting the back of my desk chair.
Saaaaaraaaaaah? I said shyly. What are you doing?
You see, Sarah explained. I know that you do no like to be touched so I am hugging your chair instead.
Sarah and me (#1)
Last year I said miserably to the queen of the tres tres popular TAs, aw, why are you always picking on Sarah and me? It is not fair.
It is fair, she contradicted me pertly. (name deleted) and me get to be popular. You and Sarah get to be pretty.
It is fair, she contradicted me pertly. (name deleted) and me get to be popular. You and Sarah get to be pretty.
Saturday, September 03, 2005
trouble
Wow. said Sharon. That girl looked really hot, right? Wow. said Sharon. It sure looked (to me) like you were going to hook up with her. Wow. (Names of boys in our department deleted) are totally into her.
current affirmations.
Boys are not like girls.
Boys will be friends with you if you sleep with a girl they like.
Boys are not like that. (QED).
current affirmations.
Boys are not like girls.
Boys will be friends with you if you sleep with a girl they like.
Boys are not like that. (QED).
first day of class
theme: anime character
point of fashion: rainbow wristwatch
accessories
black laceup boots with
charcoal kneesocks
blue anime skirt (caution: attracts trouble)
wine colored hoody
rainbow necklace
night before class ritual: burying pyjamas in backyard.
current weight: 114, approx. (no longer constitutes Serious Emergency).
eyebrows: 2 (attentively groomed)
patches of eczema: 7 (Serious Emergency!!!!)
overall condition of skin: honking (extremely bad)
tan level: zero
tan lines: none
point of fashion: rainbow wristwatch
accessories
black laceup boots with
charcoal kneesocks
blue anime skirt (caution: attracts trouble)
wine colored hoody
rainbow necklace
night before class ritual: burying pyjamas in backyard.
current weight: 114, approx. (no longer constitutes Serious Emergency).
eyebrows: 2 (attentively groomed)
patches of eczema: 7 (Serious Emergency!!!!)
overall condition of skin: honking (extremely bad)
tan level: zero
tan lines: none
what I learned on my summer vacation
The thing about intelligent choices is that they feel cold to the touch, like a park bench not a person, like an ox shaped drum that is not going to be stricken by a mallett wrapped in cotton any time soon. (from a May post on this blog)
However,
The stupid choices ALSO feel cold to the touch, like a park bench not a person, like an ox shaped drum that is not going to be stricken by a mallett wrapped in cotton any time soon. That's why those choices are called dumb.
My intelligent squiggly line has been returned to the friend pile.
However,
The stupid choices ALSO feel cold to the touch, like a park bench not a person, like an ox shaped drum that is not going to be stricken by a mallett wrapped in cotton any time soon. That's why those choices are called dumb.
My intelligent squiggly line has been returned to the friend pile.
Friday, September 02, 2005
My blog will also serve as a guide to peer tutoring,
said Sharon. Wait a second. I can't have that blog. I might get assassinated.
MY blog is going to be the first popular
Malcolm X blog, Sharon said. This is what I think about Malcolm X on September 7. This is what I think about Malcolm X on September 8. This is what I think about Malcolm X after the QE. Very, very popular blog. Yes, I am single. No, I do not have any peircings.
but Sharon is not listening.
she is going around the kitchen like, whose the girl? I'm the girl! Whose the girl? I'm the girl. Go, go, go, go. Go girl. Go girl. This is Sharon calling you live from the nonautistic world.
the google search that retreived this blog
was "blogger" and "me".
Yeah! Said Sharon when she whacked it, the nonautistic people go,
go nts, go nts, go nts.
Um Sharon, they can't go like that, I said, or they are going to get beat up.
Yeah! Said Sharon when she whacked it, the nonautistic people go,
go nts, go nts, go nts.
Um Sharon, they can't go like that, I said, or they are going to get beat up.
connotation/denotation
My downstairs neighbors have bewildered me:
Can anybody tell me why it is considered "ghetto" to have French provencal furniature?
Can anybody tell me why it is considered "ghetto" to have French provencal furniature?
I mean, the field of technical communication
is all about creating documents that can keep people and things from spontaneously exploding.
extreme fieldwork
The Plan:
to do my departmentally required interdisciplinary coursework in the field of Hazardous Waste Management.
The Challenge:
A conversation with Myrtle where I convince her to sign a form saying I can do interdisciplinary coursework in the field of Hazardous Waste Management.
The Reward:
Casually telling a prospective hiring committee that I did my interdisciplinary work in the field of Hazardous Waste Management.
to do my departmentally required interdisciplinary coursework in the field of Hazardous Waste Management.
The Challenge:
A conversation with Myrtle where I convince her to sign a form saying I can do interdisciplinary coursework in the field of Hazardous Waste Management.
The Reward:
Casually telling a prospective hiring committee that I did my interdisciplinary work in the field of Hazardous Waste Management.
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